Today’s Pet Peeves


1. Sycophants and “yes men” (or women). It absolutely sets my teeth on edge when people continually kiss the ass of someone in a position of power. I have seen people doing this even when the person in charge is very nice, reasonable, and neither requires, expects or falls for that kind of behavior. It is just not in my nature to be that way. I’d have a hard time doing it even if I thought it was a good idea. I’m sorry but if the boss takes a dump I’m not going to tell her it smells like flowers, if you get my drift. It drives me insane when the boss could come in and say, “We’re going to start lining up the customers and shooting them in the face as soon as they walk in the door,” and twelve people would say, “That’s a GREAT idea” Now, I’m not saying one should walk around work (or wherever) blasting every decision made and trumpeting every single disagreement they have with the higher-ups. A little prudence should always be exercise, in the interest of self-preservation. But I’m more of the school of thought that, if I don’t like something, I may not tell the person in charge, “I HATE THIS!” but I also am not going to smile and bob my head excitedly and lie through my teeth about it. If it’s in my best interests to keep quiet, I will, but I also won’t pretend I think it’s an awesome decision, and, if asked, I would be honest. Also, there are other times when something is a fine or at least okay idea, or a point of clarification is made and people fall all over themselves in a rush to praise the bearer of the news, as though the entire point of the information was a test to see who would make the effort to brown-nose over it. (One specific person at a former job really sticks out in my mind for this.)
I am not sure what’s more irritating: people who suck-up and glad-hand a person in authority who really has no desire to even be treated that way but is too nice to say so, and therefore it’s completely unnecessary, or situations where the guy in charge is a pompous blowhard and thinks he deserves to have his butt smooched (a la Donald Trump) yet the people under him are so intimidated and so desperate to make money that they continue to stroke his already grossly inflated ego by kowtowing.
2. This is a close relative of #1. It drives me completely up the wall when people say things they don’t mean. If someone has an idea and it doesn’t interest you, fine! But don’t tell the person how great it is and how much you look forward to it when you have no intention of ever participating. I’m not saying you should spit in the person’s face and tell them their idea sucks. I’m just saying, if you aren’t on board with something DON’T pretend that you are! The old adage goes, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it,” NOT “If you don’t have anything nice to say, lie.” Just be quiet, for crying out loud. You are NOT winning friends and making people feel good by lying to them about being interested in something and then blowing them off later. That causes a LOT more upset than someone not showing interest from the start or, heaven forbid, actually being honest and saying, “I can’t participate right now.”


About msmaryb

I'm a native Californian who lives in Oklahoma. I'm a full-time student, pursuing a Bachelors in Anthropology, following which I hope to attain a Masters in Archaeology. I have three kids, one husband, no pets, and a lot of friends - most of whom live inside my computer. I love to read, write, watch tv (shut up, we can't all be brain surgeons), shop, and travel. I'm trying to set foot in all 50 states before I die. I have 38, so far. I love the Beatles and Maroon 5, and if you think those two things are incongruous, well, they are. But that's me. When I love something, I love it 100%. I don't do anything halfway. I want to know everything there is to know, so I'm trying to cram as much into my brain as I can in the short amount of time I'm allotted in this dimension.

4 responses »

  1. Mary: as President, founder, originator and mistress of The Incorrigible Night Owl Blog, allow me to tell you 1) I think your sight is super-awesome fantastic, 2) I agree with everything you said in the Pet Peeve entry, 3) I’m with you…I hate yes men, yes women, suck ups, all of them. I’m on board with you all the way, 1000%.
    And keep up the good work. 🙂

  2. Dang, I was trying to read between the lines but I don’t know what impetus coerced these words of wisdom from you.

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