For the Record

Standard

Dear Cosmo,
When, in an effort to curry your favor and affection, thereby securing my possessions from being urinated upon, I open the door to let you out and it’s raining, snowing, sleeting, or otherwise nasty, there is no need to glare at me balefully as you saunter away from the door, nose high in the air, on your way to sleep for the next ten hours in comfort on my bed. Despite the fact that I procure your food in a manner which is inexplicable to you and make your litter box deposits disappear, seemingly magically, I am, in fact, not omnipotent and cannot control the weather. It is not my fault.
Sincerely,
The Human

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About msmaryb

I'm a native Californian who lives in Oklahoma. I'm a full-time student, pursuing a Bachelors in Anthropology, following which I hope to attain a Masters in Archaeology. I have three kids, one husband, no pets, and a lot of friends - most of whom live inside my computer. I love to read, write, watch tv (shut up, we can't all be brain surgeons), shop, and travel. I'm trying to set foot in all 50 states before I die. I have 38, so far. I love the Beatles and Maroon 5, and if you think those two things are incongruous, well, they are. But that's me. When I love something, I love it 100%. I don't do anything halfway. I want to know everything there is to know, so I'm trying to cram as much into my brain as I can in the short amount of time I'm allotted in this dimension.

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